Thursday, January 9, 2014

"The Perfect Wife"

There's a reason why that title is in quotations, because it doesn't exist.


The entire time Cam and I were engaged, all I heard was marriage is hard.  Things will change when you live together.  The loving feelings will go away.  Be prepared to fight constantly.  Blah, blah, blah.

Some of that is true, marriage is hard.  And I have read and heard a lot about how the first year of marriage is particularly hard.  And I told myself the entire time we were dating and engaged that I was ready to take all of those challenges head on.  The only thing I wasn't prepared for, is me being my worst enemy.

My wedding day was total bliss, much to my surprise.  After some fleeting anxiety that morning, I had one of the most relaxed and joyous days of my life.  The minute we got in that car, rice-covered and beaming ear to ear, it all set in.  I'm married.

Immediately, I felt a TON of pressure.  And it only got worse when we moved in together.  The funny thing was, NONE of this pressure was coming from Cameron.  He never looked at me and said, "ok, now that we are married, you need to wash my clothes, cook my dinner, clean my dishes, pick up after me, and be there to grant my every wish."  I had put this whole burden on myself.

I subconsciously told myself that I had to be the "perfect wife."  Somewhere in my crazy little mind, I thought if I didn't become the spitting image of June Cleaver, then Cameron would change his mind and divorce me.  It became my top priority to have my house look like Southern Living magazine, and cook dinners that Rachel Ray raved about (every night I might add), and never allow Cam to wear the same pair of pants twice.  And, in part, I blame Pinterest and some of my fellow bloggers.  It is fabulous that some women have the time, talent and will to be Susie-homemaker.  But I am not sure that's who I am.  And that's fabulous, too.

Moral of the story, your husband fell in love with exactly who you are.

I am a Southern, born and raised, conservative, Christian woman that HATES to clean and cook.

Go figure? 


2 comments:

  1. I was wondering why you were cooking so much;) You and Cam will be fine...and you can hire a maid!

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    Replies
    1. Hah! It's been exhausting! But I am letting up on myself a little bit!

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